Narrative and expository

Hi all, this is my new post. I have just done my first expository with continuous editing and through hard work, I believe that this is good, and please comment! Thanks!

Narrative

It was the first time in his entire life that he was in the hospital; it was the first time that he could rest, not only from the stress of us, his family, but also from work; it was also the first time that he had to encounter death in the face. He had been told, very gently, that he was going to die…

“Bang!” I looked back, and what I saw appalled me. All the time in the world suddenly stopped, and it seemed like an eternity for me to react to the situation. He was flown far away, and still sailing in the air, slowly like a leaf. The car’s impact was so great that there was an apparent dent in the car’s bonnet. I stared at the car driver, who was still gripping his wheel tightly, hands shaking tremendously, sweat dripping down from his forehead onto his striped shirt. His eyes were wide open, obviously shocked by this incident that had just unfolded before him. ”Pong!” a sick sound of someone’s body hitting the road rang out loud, causing alarm bells to ring in everyone’s mind. I spun my head around, and dashed towards my poor son, Tony, while Sharon ran to the driver and started scolding him. My heart was palpitating at the speed of lightning , as my forehead broke out into cold sweat. Nervousness and agitation overwhelmed me as I was afraid for my son’s welfare. Cars stopped by the road, as I kneeled on the floor and started crying. Then a ragged man, with dirty hair and a untidy dressing walked over, and with a stupid cheeky grin, whispered to me, “He is going to die!” He had been told, very gently, that he was going to die. His face had been disfigured as blood started gashing out of all his blood wounds, creating a pool of blood around us. Blood covered his entire face, as his eyelids were closed, and full of cuts all over his body. Commuters, car drivers, and passers-by all crowded over to look at the current situation. I looked up and begged, “Please… please… someone please call the ambulance!” At my continuous pleas, only then did someone willingly called the ambulance and it did not take long before the ambulance and police arrived, to take the driver back to the police station for investigation.

I sat in the ambulance, with the terrible condition of my son just before my eyes. It did not take long before I broke down into tears again. I covered my face with my hands, ashamed and embarrassed at the current situation of my son and how I caused it…

“If I had not gone overboard in my conversation with Sharon, he would not have ran on to the road and this accident would not have happened. Argh, I should have been more careful and aware of my surroundings, instead of just talking to Sharon. It could have been avoided, if I had been ore careful that that. It was al my fault that Tony is now injured,” As she spoke, she caressed the face of Tony, as blood was smeared on to her hands and her fingers, “It isn’t the driver’s fault, it isn’t Tony’s fault, it isn’t Sharon’s fault, it is all my fault. I am really sorry Tony, that it was because of my carelessness that got you into this current state now. As she spoke, tears came streaming down her face.

At the hospital, the nurses and the doctors handled everything, but what I could not hide and prevent was my shame and guilt and not only so, but my anxiety for my son. I shivered at the thought of losing him forever. I called my husband and told him about the entire issue as hot tears flowed down my reddened cheeks. Within minutes, the agitated father arrived, and shook me and said with his eyes glaring at me, “How could you be so irresponsible? Do you know what is your role as a parent? It is not to play! It is for your son to respect you and therefore, you receive the title. Is this what you are supposed to be doing as a mother?” With all that ranting, he calmed down and sat down, as I did too.

We were all silent throughout the entire period of the operation and soon he was out but still in a comatose and needed to be placed in the ICU, as his condition was critical.

Time passed quickly, as my husband and I took turns to be with out child. When all hopes were lost, with him being in comatose for 69 days, his hand twitched. My head, which was buried in my hands, immediately jolted up and hope was glittering in my eyes. His head then slowly turned as his eyelids opened, one by one. I grinned and immediately shouted for the doctors and nurses to enter to have a checkup on him. As the room was covered and flooded with the doctors, I heaved a sigh of relief, as I was able to stop the self-reproaching and be able to relax for a moment. I then immediately called my husband to come over and told him the good news. I was jumping for joy and my heart was pumping very quickly, but it is not because of my sadness, but because of my joy that this mistake of mine was corrected by the determination of my son.

“Once bitten, twice shy”. From that day onwards, it was a life-changing transformation for not only me, but for my son. Not only did I understand what it means to be able to honour the title of being called a parent, but also understand that I have to be aware of my surroundings. I not only have to be extremely careful with wherever I bring Tony to, but also beware of is actions. As for Tony, he smiles at me, very often. Despite the disfiguration of his beautiful face, his smile is still genuine, ad full of emotions. I smile at him, and he smiles back at me.


Expository

2b) “Stress is good for you” What are your views to this statement?

Students studying in groups in the library, rushing through their daily homework; students tapping furiously at the keyboards, their eyes sweeping through lines and lines of words; students dashing past, running to their next destination for their important lectures. Throughout their entire globe, a phenomenon is happening. Students and adults alike, are faced with a constant pressure that they have to bear: stress. Is stress really an unwelcomed visitor into our world, our society and our private lives? Undoubtedly, it is. It sweeps through the entire nation, entering houses stealthily under the cover of darkness, and like a gas, it enters our bedrooms, sliding through the doors and affecting everyone, causing people to do several extremist means, such as committing suicide, just to escape.. On the other hand, committing suicide may not be the only result of stress, in fact it actually even leads to self-motivation and peer pressure, which causes people to do better than usual.

Stress is constantly surrounding us, like how the hot and humid weather bears down its weight upon us. People may believe that stress is harmful to oneself and may even affect one’s grades. However, self-motivation may also bloom from one’s stressful life. For instance, someone who leads a stressful life and is able to cope with stress, and has poor grades and a poor attitude to life, may be saddened by his grades and in the end, he is able to activate the potential that is innate in him, through self-motivation. Stress activates self-motivation as the willingness in him to do well and excel is present. Therefore, one may think that stress is harmful to one, but yet, they do not think of the benefits that stress may bring.

There are different types of motivation, such as self-motivation and peer pressure. All these contribute to the benefits of stress. However, one may never understand how peer pressure can help oneself. When there is stress, the people around you will also be affected. As you are self-motivated, you will become more hardworking, more efficient and faster as you finish your work. The people around you will soon become under the same pressure as you are as they are afraid to lose out to you due to our students’ competitive nature. This will cause them to undergo peer pressure, by being afraid to lose out to others. For instance, would Usain Bolt exceed his limits and expectations running on a track with competitors around him, trying to push him to his limits or would Usain Bolt exceed expectations and perform better just by running on a track with the stadium empty, devoid of any people? Therefore, one may think that stress is harmful, but it indeed brings some benefits.

However, there are also banes in which stress will harm oneself while leading a stressful life. Indeed there are some who will succumb to pressure, committing suicide in order to be able to escape and getaway from this stressful life, and while no one expects to commit suicide without reason, undue stress can compel one to do the unthinkable and this can happen to anyone who face stress. For instance, one who leads a stressful life and is unable to cope with the amount of stress may think of escaping, as a resort to remove the burden off their shoulders. They have a totally contrasting and different mindset as compared to those who have a competitive nature, as they will never succumb to the thought of committing suicide or other extremist means in order to escape from reality. In true fact, those who are competitive will continue on, constantly trying to get ahead of the others. Therefore, stress has banes too, such as the extreme cases of people committing suicides.

Stress is a double-edged sword, it causes people to be motivated, be it through peer pressure or self-motivation and it also causes the unthinkable to happen, like one committing suicide, through the pressure and burden on their shoulders. One must never be narrow-minded and just consider the banes of stress. Instead, one must be able to understand the true meaning of stress and the ways in order to cope with it, in order to be able to use it effectively and to his own advantage. We can disregard the importance of stress and brush it off as an unnecessary evil visitor in our lives. Yet we can also embrace stress head-on and turn it into motivation for oneself and for others. What would your choice be?

Parents -- Are you willing to change your mentality?

I have sent in this article to The Straits Times Forum. AND GUESS WHAT? My article is posted on ST Forum online!!!!! This is the link: http://www.straitstimes.com/STForum/OnlineStory/STIStory_555407.html

Here it is, with the comments:

Post:

Why Primary 1 exams are necessary

I AGREE with Mr Wee Hien Seng's letter last Saturday ("PSLE - the unfactored

elephant in the room...").

When I was a Primary 1 pupil, we had year-end exams and I was probably not

alone in experiencing the stress of having to go for tuition for a variety of

subjects such as maths, English and Chinese.

Although the Government plans to incorporate new forms of assessments like

"show and tell" and drama, these will not change parents' tuition mindset.

The Primary School Leaving Examination will still ensure that parents remain

exam-minded.

Exams are necessary to gauge a pupil's ability and grasp of knowledge for

that year. Primary 1 is an important foundation year, and it is necessary to

get a gauge of pupils' understanding of the basics before they progress to

Primary 2.

Parents, are you willing to change your exam mentality?

Ong Sean

Latest comments

For parents to be less kiasu, the government must rename all secondary schools to "Raffles Institution" and "Raffles Girls School". Posted by: munny123 at Tue Jul 20 15:39:04 SGT 2010 Yep let primary schools be play schools, Let the children learn thru play and interaction and bulid up more EQ skills. Posted by: orangemonster at Tue Jul 20 09:43:20 SGT 2010 Sean yes remove the exams and mindsets will change. Posted by: ganeshsharmak at Tue Jul 20 08:29:07 SGT 2010 In California, students in public school sit for the California standardized testing in spring every year. I am always amused when I hear many kiasu Asian parents have their kids prepare and study for these tests. Doesn't that defeats the purpose of testing? Posted by: carol_y_wong at Tue Jul 20 06:41:53 SGT 2010 My apology...it should be what was "taught", not "thought" for the school year. Posted by: carol_y_wong at Tue Jul 20 06:41:06 SGT 2010

____________________________________________________________________

This is the original email that I intended to send.

I refer to “PSLE – the unfactored elephant in the room…” on The Straits Times forum on the 17th of July, 2010.

While I welcome the Government’s decision to remove the Primary 1 exams entirely, and in place, “show and tell”, I strongly believe that this would not be effective.

Even though it would be welcomed by most of the parents and students, that it would be refreshing start to a student in Primary 1, I believe that it would not be helpful in the long run.

As a Secondary 2 student studying in a premier school in the Bukit Timah area, I have gone through and experienced fully what life in primary 1 is. At that time, it was just the start of nightmares. Many parents would also agree.

We had end of the year exams, and I believe that many like me had tuition all day round. Be it Mathematics, English, or Chinese, we all had the same amount of stress.

However, now the government would like to replace the exams with “show and tell”. In Primary 1, many of us just knew how to write the word “me” in Chinese, and easy vocabulary in English. I believe that most Primary 2 students would not even know how to present their ideas in primary 2 effectively, let alone a primary 1 student.

Secondly, although the government would like to incorporate into them a skill for presentation, I believe that their parents still would not be able to change their mindset of being stressed out and having tuitions. Although eye contact, confidence and oration skills are important, PSLE deters the parents from not being too exam-minded.

Being a “kiasu” society is the entire core of the issue.

Even if exams were removed, the students would still need to take the PSLE exams. As quoted from “PSLE – the unfactored elephant in the room…”, it is said that “They can learn about the measurements by baking a cake, but it will not help them in the PSLE”.

Now, teachers, parents and students are already born with the mentality of being afraid to lose out, and being competitive, would it be effective to just remove the Primary 1 exams? Why not remove the entire system of exams, all the way from Primary 1 to Junior College 2, removing the end of year exams and major exams like PSLE, O-Level and A-Level? Why is the government not doing so? That is because it is not feasible and because exams are needed to be able to gauge the students’ ability for that year. Therefore, why even remove the Primary 1 exams, and still include the Primary 2 exams?

In Primary 1, that is an important year for all students. It is their first year of officially being a student. They need to understand the basics that will be taught in Primary 1 to progress and improve, in order to be able to enter Primary 2. However, by removing the Primary 1 exams, wouldn’t that be equivalent to killing the students’ understanding to the basics?

In Primary 1, the basics are important. If exams are removed, their ability as to understanding the Primary 1 basics would not be essential. They would just think that “Oh, there is no exams, therefore, I need not understand the basics” and continuously, if this goes on, they would not even be able to understand Primary 2 work, let alone Primary 3 and onwards.

Although I totally agree with what Mrs Grace Fu, Senior Minister of State for National Development and Education, that "These proposed changes seek to develop our children to be confident persons, self-directed learners and caring citizens, while equipping them with enduring knowledge and values and the necessary 21st century skills and dispositions”, I do not think that it should be implemented in Primary 1.

Parents’ mentality would not be easily changed, just like how stress can’t be easily removed. Stress can only be temporarily put away, and it will constantly come back. If the government would implement this idea of a heavier emphasis on “show and tell” and on other “bite-sized assessments’, it should have been implemented as soon as possible and it should start earlier, probably even K1 or K2.

I believe that although this idea is well thought-out and that it is a constructive idea that can be implemented, Primary 1 would be too late a time.

Parents, are you willing to change your mentality for your children’s future?

Dulce et Decorum Est

Dulce et Decorum Est

Bent double, like old beggars under sacks,
Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge,
Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs
And towards our distant rest began to trudge.
Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots
But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind;
Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots
Of disappointed shells that dropped behind.


GAS! Gas! Quick, boys!-- An ecstasy of fumbling,
Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time;
But someone still was yelling out and stumbling
And floundering like a man in fire or lime.--
Dim, through the misty panes and thick green light
As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.


In all my dreams, before my helpless sight,
He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.


If in some smothering dreams you too could pace
Behind the wagon that we flung him in,
And watch the white eyes writhing in his face,
His hanging face, like a devil's sick of sin;
If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood
Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs,
Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud
Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues,--
My friend, you would not tell with such high zest
To children ardent for some desperate glory,
The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est
Pro patria mori.

1) Title:

Once I saw this poem, I felt that it was a very interesting poem because of what I caught sight of. Firstly, the title is in Latin, which is an old language and is somehow going to be “extinct” in the world although some people still use it. It reads “Dulce et Decorum Est”. Well, I believe that you will be as amazed and puzzled as I was, which was to be not able to understand a single word that he is talking about. Anyway, this Latin phrase “Dulce et Decorum Est” is again repeated at the end of the poem, and instead of just saying that, it reads “ The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est Pro patria mori”. I shall explain both phrases to you.

I had to do some background research on that in order to understand.

The title and the Latin exhortation of the final two lines are drawn from the phrase "Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori" written by the Ancient Roman poet -- Horace in:

Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori:
mors et fugacem persequitur virum
nec parcit inbellis iuventae
poplitibus timidove tergo.

"How sweet and fitting it is to die for one's country:
Death pursues the man who flees,
spares not the hamstrings or cowardly backs
Of battle-shy youths."

These words were well known and often quoted by supporters of the war near its inception and were, therefore, of particular relevance to soldiers of the era.

In 1913, the first line, “Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori”, was inscribed on the wall of the chapel of the Royal Military Academy Sandhurst In the final stanza of his poem, Owen refers to this as "The old Lie."

(From : http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dulce_et_Decorum_Est)

So in fact, what Owen meant was that “It was sweet and fitting to die for one’s country”, according to the title and the last line.

2) General poem:

In here, after having some background knowledge as to what Owen meant about the title and the last line, we know that what he is saying is that war is horrendously horrible, and therefore, we should avoid it. This stance is just like how other poets write their poems, except for the fact that The Soldier by Rupert Brooke was glorifying the war.

So, the general direction of the poem is gearing towards the harmful effects of war. Now, we shall analyse the poem to fit my stance that war sucks and that it has horrible effect on the people.

3) Paragraphs:

There are four different paragraphs. I shall now be talking about Stanza 1. In Stanza 1, the poet describes the surroundings of war with a bang, stating that the soldiers were “Bent double, like old beggars under sacks”. It is a form of simile, to show how haggard the soldiers are. Also, I would like to bring your attention to the words “Bent double”. What does that mean? You may just see it as a soldier bending, under the heavy weight. However read between the lines. It states that “Bent double”. It actually shows you that the soldiers are like doubling, it shows that the soldiers are like weird, monstrous creatures as they double. Onto the next 3 lines, what does it give an impression of? “Bent double”, “Knock-kneed”, “haunting flares”? It obviously gives a sense of creepiness, a sense of weirdness, as to why the soldiers are being tortured so cruelly. This is to build up the atmosphere of the poem showing the harmful effects of war it has on the soldiers. On the fourth line, it states that “Men marched asleep”. This is somewhat not possible in our daily lives, it shows that the soldiers are abnormal, like creatures, as they have no brain of their own to control themselves. It creates a sense of fear towards these men, as they start to turn into funny creatures. On the fifth line, it states that the soldiers who had lost their shoes “limped on, blood-shod”. Don’t the soldiers feel a sense of pain as they walk on the gravel, or shells, barefooted? They should be able to feel the pain as blood oozed out of the wounds. However, they are not able to feel a thing at all, emphasizing on my point that they are like creatures. “All went lame, all blind” also restates my point that they were monsters. It was also somehow shown that the misery and pain is a universal condition, and that no one escaped from the wrath.

The second stanza, and it starts off with a larger BANG! “GAS! Gas!” gives the reader a sense of surprise and make them feel worried. It sends the readers a signal of foreshadowing, that something is going to happen, and sends the readers into a state of panic, making them empathise with the soldiers who are facing the gas. Also, it makes the reader understand the situation at that time when the generals or people of higher authority are shouting to the soldiers to get a move on as they have an “ecstasy of fumbling”. This again shows that the use of poisonous gas in the war, to kill the soldiers are quite common, and that they know the necessary steps as to how to avoid being killed. Owen also makes use of many words that are related to being nervous and worried, such as the action of “floundering”, “stumbling”, “clumsy”, “fumbling”. All these adjectives show how nervous the soldiers were at that point of time. Owen also uses the colour green a lot of times, to describe the surroundings of the gas, such as “lime”, “green sea” and “thick green light”.

The third stanza, albeit being the shortest of the lot, having just two lines, however, it is the most descriptive stanza of the entire poem. It is the most vivid in terms of the description, because Owen says that “In all my dreams, before my helpless sight”. It causes audience and readers to probably misunderstand what he is referring to as “helpless”. This is because he is probably talking about the soldier inside being helpless, or himless, saying that his eyesight is failing and he has helpless eyesight, or that in his sight, he is helpless and does not know what he is able to do to save his compatriot. Also, it forms a constant horror to him as he continuously sees the same horrific scene when his friend dies in the poisonous gas, being that “He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning”.

The fourth stanza, it is the conclusion for the entire poem. The dead, who was killed by the poisonous gas, had “white eyes writhing in his face” and the use of simile comes into use here when Owen states that “His hanging face, like a devil’s such of sin”. It once again allows me to re-emphasize on my point that the soldiers were like monsters, and also, when a person enters the world, and dies, the eyes carry the same innocence of the world and the same numbness in terms of the feelings described. Therefore, the person that is dead, looks like a slayed dead monster. Also, I would like to emphasize on the last phrase: “The old Lie: Dulce et decorum est Pro patria mori”. Compare the English translation of this to the title: How sweet and fitting it is to die for one’s country and Sweet and fitting it is respectively. Well, it is a complete irony and the meanings are of an opposite. Therefore, Owen uses it as a complete irony to his title.

4) Conclusion:

Therefore, after analysing the poem with whatever resources I have, I believe that this is the best poem in describing war from a perspective, stating that war is a bane, instead of glorifying war. It is the most vividly described poem ever.

So a general recap. Owen is great in writing poems that include horrible scenes, and is a great writer when depicting the war scene. This is also because he had a first-hand experience in war and was once a soldier before. The title also totally contradicts with the last line, which is the most important line as it is like Owen’s stance to the war as a whole. Remember “the old Lie: Dulce et Decorum Est Pro patria mori”!

Anthem For Doomed Youth

Anthem for Doomed Youth

What passing-bells for these who die as cattle?

Only the monstrous anger of the guns.

Only the stuttering rifles' rapid rattle

Can patter out their hasty orisons.

No mockeries now for them; no prayers nor bells;

Nor any voice of mourning save the choirs, –

The shrill, demented choirs of wailing shells;

And bugles calling for them from sad shires.

What candles may be held to speed them all?

Not in the hands of boys but in their eyes

Shall shine the holy glimmers of goodbyes.

The pallor of girls' brows shall be their pall;

Their flowers the tenderness of patient minds,

And each slow dusk a drawing-down of blinds.

Analysis

1) Title and poem

To help understand a poem in great detail, understanding the title is of utmost importance. It gives us a great clue as to what the poem might be. It is almost paradoxical and is ironical. The word "Anthem" refers to as joyous celebration or the respect for a country through the "National Anthem", however, the title is paradoxical because of the word "Doomed". It represents that the youths already know that they are going to die, and their fates are sealed. No matter what you do or what the family does, it is unable to change their destiny. It also shows that the entire war is already a forgone conclusion right from the start, which does not give the soldiers involved a much-needed boost of morale. The entire title reminds us of how the youths' future has been destined by others, and shows that the others have a much greater authority and position of power.

The poem also talks much about the entire situation. Instead of the prayers and the bells being the youths' last tribute, they talk about the “passing bells”, otherwise known as the toll-bell to inform others of one person’s death, and the “rifles’ rapid rattle” and the situation at war being the youths’ last tribute. It is their “present” for their efforts in the war.

2) Imagery

There are many forms of imagery that is represented in the poem, some are those like simile, personification and alliteration.

There are many different similes that can be seen in the poem, such as those like the youths, dying “as cattle”. As the people are seen as dying cattle, it also shows one thing. It re-emphasizes on my point that the youths’ destiny has long gone been fixed. Dying cattle walk as one large group, as they walk together to their deaths, and as the youths are represented as cattle, it shows that the youths are going to die as one whole bunch and also that their deaths are insignificant.

Alliteration is also largely emphasized within the poem. “rifles’ rapid rattle” is a form of alliteration, and it elaborates on the letter “r”, which shows the constant shooting of the gun and also the constant killing of the people. It creates a somber and a fatalistic atmosphere. “glimmers of goodbyes” is another alliteration. It shows how the families say goodbyes to their loved ones, as if they would never be seeing them again, which also shows a glum atmosphere.

Personification is also largely emphasized on within the poem. This is when the sounds of the “monstrous anger of the guns”. It compares the guns to the youths or rather people. This is because of the word “anger”. It is a feeling that only animals and people will possess, and therefore, the gun is personified as a human, being angry and ready to kill. Another personified thing is "the shrill, demented choirs of wailing shells”. This is personified because the grenades cannot be wailing, and it is only humans that can cry and wail, therefore, it shows how the grenade sounds like as it flies through the air.

3) Onomatopoeia

Onomatopoeia is shown throughout the entire poem. Examples include those of “rifles’ rapid rattle”, “demented choirs of wailing shells” and also “patter out”. It shows the entire surroundings during the war and what happens. All these are sounds that are created when the two oppositions attack each other, through guns, or through grenades. It shows the audience who were not there, who did not have a first hand experience of how it was like to be at a war, to be at the frontlines, to visualize the entire situation.

4) Conclusion

This poem is very renowned and it is known throughout the entire globe. It truly depicts the entire surroundings of the soldier and whatever that happens at the frontlines for those who did not go there. It talks about being pessimistic, and about how the destiny of the boys have already been fixed by a person of higher authority. This in turn creates the glum atmosphere and the entire fatalistic, somber surroundings.

Also, the last line “And each slow dusk a drawing-down of blinds”, it totally emphasizes on the relentless inevitability of the passing of time, from summer to winter. It in turn shows that death is inevitable and that everyone must face it, sooner or later. I can conclude that fate and destiny can never be changed, like time.